...and now for a brighter note...

Sorry for all my gloom and "poor me" crap.

Here is something fun. A snippet from my favourite Christmas cartoon, "A Wish For Wings That Work"..



Emjoy!

This Christmas blows goats

Well, these have been my best friends for the last 3 days...


I have been sick on and off for about 2 months now, and naturally the worst of it has to hit at Christmas. I have no energy, one hell of a sore throat and chest, no voice at all, plenty of phlegm and a lot of hatred for viruses.

I missed all the fun stuff and it seriously bums me out; the Gates of Winter/IT/Startlefish show, Al Wood and Lindsay at Bottom's Up, the A&PHL, Dan Nystedt's house party, Shannon's birthday...this sucks...

I have barely been out of the house since work on Friday night.

...and James Brown died this morning...

Merry fucking Christmas.

Baby Jesus' Birthday and stuff...

At this time of year, stress, bills and tension mounts. Just keep in mind that the holidays are a time for family, friends and giving.

For the men out there who have no idea what to give their little lady, may I offer this suggestion?

Ya know, I may not like the guy's music that much, but every day I gain more and more respect for Mr. Timberlake.

Anyhoo, just for shits and gigles, here is my very own Christmas movie quiz for y'all. Good luck!

1. What length of pole would the singer of "You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch" not touch him with?

2. What was the last thing the Grinch took from Cindy-Loo Hoo's house?

3. What was the name of the Grinch's dog? (yea, this is an easy one...)

4. What roll did Charlie Brown fill in the school Christmas play in "A Charlie Brown Christmas"?

5. What song did Lucy insist Schroder play in "A Charlie Brown Christmmas"?

6. What did Snoopy win an award for in "A Charlie Brown Christmas" and what place was he?

7. How did Opus get his letter to Santa in "A Wish For Wings That Work"?

8. What support group did Opus belong to in "A Wish For Wings That Work"?

9. What was Jack Skellington's dog's name in "A Nightmare Before Christmas"?

10. What did Sally entice Oogie-Boogie with in order to draw his attention away from Santa in a "Nightmare Before Christmas"?

11. Who did Lock, Shock and Barrel first kidnap, thinking he was Santa Claus in "A Nightmare Before Christmas"?

12. Who played Robin Willimas' character's military-minded cousin in "Toys"?

13. What was Yukon Cornelius searching for in "Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer"?

14. Why was the Abominable Snowman so angry in "Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer"?

15. Why was Hermey the elf a misfit in "Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer"? (yea, another easy one...)

Have fun and by all means, have a wicked-ass Christmas!!

The History of a Camera, Part Uno-The Love of Bands

So a while ago, Curt O'Neil started an interesting project on his blog and invited other photographers to take part...the history of their cameras in picture form. I decided it was cool, because I am after all the ultimate judge in coolness, and wanted to take part.

To read what he is getting at, click here. Too lazy to click there? Screw you, too bad. You miss out. I'm too lazy to explain it all and my laziness out-weighs your laziness on my blog.

Here are the first of the pics....


Milhouse. My best little guy and in love with the camera.


The Downbeat Lounge. My favourite watering hole and the inspiration for my band photography. Rest in peace.


Tracey Hilderly, the rockinest chick in the Sault, drumming with the Malcontents at the DBL. Note the Motley Crue t-shirt and the cowboy hat......nice!


Dustin Jones of the Inner Cuty Surfers. He rocks, he loves, he leaves. That's just what he does. The Surfers made me fall into a deep and insatiable addiction to live band photography.


Mikey Hawdon of the Inner Cuty Sufers. See the comments above. The same goes for him too.


Al Wood, Lindsay Pugh and Frank Deresti jamming at Loplops with some chicks whose name I don't remember. Not a great pic, by any stretch.


My lovely husband doing what he does best.


Trevor Heartless and Dan Nystedt posing with Rae Spoon, a Downbeat favourite and part of the bar's family.


I've always liked lamps.


Trevor Heartless during a late night, very drunk jam in the basement of the DBL.

There you have my first insallment of the history of my camera, which was purchased in March of 2006. I have taken over 12 000 pictures with it. I never plan to stop.

Ever.

Me 'n Motley Crue

Yes.

Finally a new post.

I know what you're thinking.

I don't love you any more.

I couldn't be bothered with the twos an twos of people that actually read my blog.

Now that I write for SooToday.com, I'm 'too good' to blog.

Well, my friends, none of these are true.

The fact of the matter is, I'm really fucking busy most of the time. And the times I have to myself, I spend sleeping or ... well, sleeping.

I also engage in the occasional adult beverage now and again, but since my injury I have cut that down quite a bit. My bank account thanks me.

So, as the title of this post indicates, I have recently had some dealings with the good old Motley Mother Fucking Crue. That's right, I had the honour of covering the show for SooToday.com, which meant I could take pictures (in a VERY limited capacity) at the show.

I was scared as shit.

I have never shot an arena show before.

I had no idea what to expect.

It was weird.

I showed up according to pre-arranged agreements with arena staff and it all turned out to be wrong.

I was pissed.

I then followed my nose as the toucan taught me and was able to at least get inside the doors. This made me a bit less pissed off.

I had borrowed lenses from all over the place and it turns out the one lens I should have grabbed was the one I did not.

FUCK!

You see, the media were only allowed to take pictures at the very front of the stage for the VERY FIRST SONG. During said first song ( and it turns out, for most of the show really) it was all smoke and strobe lights. These are not good for photographers. At least inexperienced ones like me.

I did get a fucking kick ass shot of Nikki Sixx pointing right at me, however. You'll have to wait to see it in a photo gallery on SooToday as I was forced to sign a waiver that stated I would not reproduce, sell or display the photos for any purpose other than SooToday.

Bummer.

Anyway, after the first song, we were ushered to the penalty box at the Steelback Centre, which is not REALLY far back, but far enough back that I was unhappy with the zoom I had borrowed. We were there for two songs and two songs exactly. No more, no less. The dude from House of Blues was very serious about his job and got us out of there right quick.

Then in order to get back into the show, I had to put my camera in the box office......or put it in my car. And since (a) most of the equipment I had was not mine and (b) my car was about 4 blocks away and it was freakin' cold out, I decided to lock it up in the box office.

After that, I found my friends in section 117 and proceeded to totally rock out with my cock out.....if I indeed had a cock it would have rocked the most, baby!

I had a fucking killer time at the show. But, unfortunately due to many circumstances, I am not overly happy with the pics. DAMN! I wish I could show them to you!

The fog, the back-lighting, my inexperience, the fact that Tommy Lee's drum riser was so high combined with him sitting so low behind them and that I opted to NOT borrow CO's lovely 200mm zoom lens result in me having a lot of regrets about this show....as a photographer.

As a rocker from way back, I tickled about the show.

I did not get one good shot of Tommy Lee and that seriously bums me out!!

But hey, it was my first big show and I have definetley learned from the experience. Next time I will know better.

Now all I want to do is get drunk and have sex with Tommy Lee...or maybe be Nkki Sixx. I haven't decided yet. They're both sexy as all get out.

Shit-Fuck-Damn.

I did get to leave with a very unique piece of memorabilia...

...my press pass...


...cool, huh?...

By all means, call me an idiot...

So you may or may not know this past past weekend was my birthday...October 29th to be exact. I had lots of plans and fun stuff and things in mind.

Well, Friday night happened and things went to hell in a hand basket.

It all started with a fantastic show at the Best Western as I went to cover Prairie Oyster for SooToday.com. Loved the show and got lots of great pictures of them. Lindsay Pugh and Jay Case were there. This made me very happy and we hung out and had a good time.

Then it was off to the Outback to see a killer band from Alberta, the Wheat Monkeys. I have seen them a few times before and was really looking foward to them. Unfortunately the lighting was really fucked up there so pictures were not going well. All of the stage lights were focused below the waist of all the band memebers so the only things that showed up were their legs and part of their guitars....no torsos or heads. It pissed me off a little.

Anyway, after a little chit chat with the band, Jay, Linds and I caught a cab down town for a few more frosty adult beverages. I wasn't drunk at this point but had a bit of a buzz on...thought it best not to drive.

Everything went down hill after that.

After drinking way too much, Jay and I shared a cab home. I had the cab driver drop me off on Wellington Street across from my house.

Bad move.

As I ran across the street, I tripped over the curb and took one hell of a nasty spill as I starfished flat on my face on the sidewalk.

The following are gruesome pictures of the resulting injuries....

....are you ready?


...this is the nasty road rash I got on my wrist trying to save my camera as I went down...




...this is the gash on my right knee...it hurts like a fucking bitch...




My left knee is also bruised and a bit swollen and my right elbow is stiff and sore. My ego is also bleeding profusely.

Yup, nothing like some disgusting oozing extremely painful injuries to make someone feel old on their birthday. Thankfully I have my own personal man-nurse....Steve Olsen.

And my camera? Well, it is damaged a bit but still works. The lens has to be replaced shortly, however.

Please, by all means, feel free to call me an idiot. I have numerous times.

Men, the fate of our planet, as well as your pecker, is in your hands...

Please, won't somebody think of the children while in the using the facilities!



It's amazing just how inportant the little things in life really are.

The Day I Killed Lars: The Tale of the Weekend That Could Not Be Resuscitated: Friday

There could have been so many different titles for this post, such as;

WOW, The Townehouse Really Smells Bad!

Do Gummie Worms Poo Cookies?

How My Life Long Dream of Visiting Port Severn Was Fulfilled

Dan, Are You Sure The Gas Station is Just Around The Corner?

I Have Never Been This Wet Without Being in The Shower or Swimming

Air mattresses Suck Ass and Can Rot in Hell!

I Stood in The Rain For Four and a Half Hours...FUCK IT!! I'm Buying a T-shirt...

Those Creepy Houses on The Side of The Highway By Blind River Truly ARE Creepy

I used the Lars one because it was the first one I thought of. What a fucking weekend. Where do I start?

As you know, Dan and I went to Toronto to see Rancid and Ben Harper. This little adventure has been in the works for about two months. I have been excited for this weekend since I ordered the tickets from Ticket Master. The night before we were to leave, I could not sleep. I decided to log on to MySpace and just look around. My heart sank as I read this bulletin posted by Alex of "The Ripcordz"...(remember, he is very French and his English is not the greatest...these are not spelling mistakes on my part...)

Just coming back from the Rancid show, they had to stop after 6 songs, Lars collapsed on the stage...It was really weird, he went straight to the hospital, i heard something to do with medication he had to take for allergies... Aniway after a while Tim annonced that they will come back to do another one for everibody who had ticket for that night...
The beginning if the show was great aniway though they all seems a bit tired...

@lex

I immediately called Dan. No answer. I then called the Downbeat. No answer. SHITFUCKDAMN!!!

A soon as Dan got to my house in the morning I told him about what I had heard. He called his friend Steve in Toronto who was going to the show with us. Steve said he would look into the situation and call us to let was know what was going on. We hit the road around 8:30 with plenty of coffee and cigarettes and a tight grip on our dreams that Rancid will not cancel.

...at this point, we are still happy at the rest stop where we ate bananas and used the bathroom...


...about ten minutes past the rest stop and about five minutes from Sudbury, we got the call from Steve telling us not to hurry...both Rancid shows in Toronto were cancelled...this is an unhappy Dan on the phone with Steve as we lunched at the Laughing Buddha...we also made a pit stop at the Townehouse...what a stinky dive...wow...

Seriously bummed out, we left Sudbury following our lovely lunch and continued to Toronto. Had it not been for our Saturday evening Ben Harper tickets, we would have just turned around and gone home. We still have Ben Harper to look forward to, right? We were happy about that. I was now driving.

"It's all my fault, Dan. I was bragging all day at work that I was going to see Rancid. I did it."

"I'm pretty sure your bragging did not give Lars Fredriksen a degenerative bone disease, Donna. It's not your fault." Dan laughed.

Dan fell asleep. We were low on gas but had plenty to get us to Parry Sound. No problem. I'll just stop there. Dan awoke just past Noble and we chatted. As I was about to turn into Parry Sound, Dan told me not to, that there was a gas station just around the corner on the side of the highway we can stop at.

"Are you sure Dan? That's not sounding familiar to me."

"Positive." he said.

We drove on.....and on......and on.....and on....no gas station. Crap. The situation is desperate. I start laughing as I come to terms with that fact that we will, very shortly, run out of gas. My first time ever.

And just as I turned off the highway to go into Port Severn (never been there), it happens.

...and there we are just seconds from port severn on the side of the road, gasless...Dan had a good walk, though...

...and there I was on the side of the road trying to keep myself amused as hundreds of people just drove by without one ounce of concern for my well being...jerks...

...Dan was only gone for about 20 minutes...a nice contractor guy with plenty of empty Coors light cans in his truck, and one in his hand, gave Dan a ride back...

On the road once more. Dan is driving again. We talk and joke and listen to really really loud music. Dan is upset that I have never seen the movie "Garden State". We get to Toronto about 8:00 without further incident.

At Grant's house (Dan's friend we are crashing with) we are met by Marty...

...this is Marty...say 'hi' Marty...he is a friendly, playful, cute and VERY large what I believe to be a Lab/St. Bernard mix...I like him a lot...

With no Rancid show, Dan and I wondered downtown to see what else was up. Turns out not a whole lot. We paid a quick visit to "Suspect Video" where their answer to everything I asked for was "No, but we can order it for you." Yeah, ya know what? I can order it too, dumb-ass. I did find a copy of "Another State of mind" for Rob cheaper than the Social Distortion website. This made me happy.

We continued to wonder. We ended up at the Horseshoe drinking free shots of Jack Daniels on the patio...some sort of promotional thing for "Deadwood" which is premiering on the History Channel soon...or already has...I don't know. I wasn't really paying attention. The band playing next door was fun and I met a very cute puppy named Benny...

...this is me and Benny...say 'hi' Benny...

...this is Dan and I on the Horseshoe patio enjoying the freaks and text messages from Shannon and booze and weird Toronto night air...

Naturally we were hungry, so naturally we went to Amato's on the way home to indulge in some of the best pizza on the planet...two slices for each of which is actually enough to feed four people. What the hell. A bit more wondering...

...this is Dan poking fun at his singlehoodness...yes, that is a wedding dress...

...this is Dan trying to look deep and serious in front of one of those annoying poster plastered walls...

We get back to Grant's and he immediately puts in "Garden State" which I loved and decided I must own. Grant and Mel arrive home after their friend's wedding and we are finally introduced. We smoke and chat and watch the rest of the movie. They inflate my bed for me and we say our good nights...

About three hours after the lights went out, I awoke ever so uncomfortable. My hip and shoulder are KILLING me. The air mattress has deflated. I spent the rest of my sleepless night getting up every couple of hours to blow up my bed...

...that was Friday...

Some Ups and Downs

AN UP - Buskerfest is over and done with for another year and it was a huge success. Thank you to all the sponsors, volunteers, spectators and performers that made this year amazing.

A DOWN - The son of a long-time friend of Rob's died recently. Very sad and tragic...he was only 24 years old.

AN UP - We got to visit with a long-time friend of Rob's who we haven't seen since our wedding back in 2000. Just wish it was under happier circumstances.

A DOWN - Rob's Grandmother passed a way at the age of 89 on Monday night. Rob is currently in Brockville for the funeral. Thank you to Jay and Carrie for the truck loan. You guys rock! By the way, if anyone is thinking of flying to Brockville for any reason, DON"T. A return flight from the Sault is over $1700.00, if you can even believe that!!

AN UP - Danner and I will be leaving bright and early tomorrow morning for the Big Smoke to see Rancid on September 1 at the Kool Haus and then Ben Harper on September 2 at the Molson Amphitheatre. Very exciting!

A DOWN - Rancid never even read the multiple messages I sent them through MySpace requesting permission to photograph their show in Toronto. I'm sad.

AN UP - I will be seeing Tim Armstrong in the flesh....fuckin' eh....

A DOWN - I am trying to not spend money in order to accommodate the up coming instalation of new windows in my house, so no merch purchases for me at the aforementioned concerts. It is going to take every fibre of will in me to not buy merch...I'm a sucker for the stuff.

AN UP - I'm getting new windows soon and the sun is shining.

A DOWN - My dogs will suffer serious separation anxiety while we are gone. Thankfully, Shauna has aggreed to stay with them over night. Thanks baby!

AN UP - I went to the second Beer Tasting at Loplops lastnight with Patti and George and it was a religious experience. One of the beers was the Mill St. Coffee Porter. Are you even fucking kidding me with that?! It combines two of my most favouritest things in the world and was utterly devine......must....get....more....NOW!!

A DOWN - There are no signs that Social Distortion will be on tour anywhere in the area any time soon. Dammit! I need another dose of that Mr. Ness....

AN UP - Due to Rob's recent record review on his blog, Les Becker has become a fan of Social D. Gooble-gobble, gooble-gobble, one of us, one of us....

Blogelation...Julio's Buskerfest Rerun Dance...

This took me forever to do and the quality of the photos is not the greatest because I had to compress the video in order to upload it into YouTube, but here it is anyway. Not bad for my first attempt at using iMovie, I think...

...oh yea...turn your volume up...waaaaay up...



Please let me know what you think...

Blogelation..."Ready to upload 849 photos?"...

This what iPhoto said to me this morning when I plugged in my memory card. It was at that point I decided I should burn some of the 4782 pictures I have stored on my computer onto discs in order to make room for the new batch. I suppose it would be smart for me to back them up anyway...this is gonna take me a while. *sigh*

849 PHOTOS!! What the hell?! Will someone please tell me to stop taking pictures?....II just can't help myself. I think I need to go to rehab or something.

So all in all, I think Buskerfest went fairly well. No major injuries. No kids passed out from heat stroke. Only a couple of disputes among the performers, although they were a cause of enormous stress for me and gave me pimples. And only one small child got accidentally lit on fire.

This year's group of performers was a blast to hang with...and they could all pound back the booze like sailors on leave, especially our two french ladies...WOW!! And every single one of them had great things to say about Sault Ste. Marie.

Jeff Krahn, AKA Scot Free, said his Saturday evening show was one of his favourites ever and he has been doing this for 15 years. The Coralies kept teling how friendly everyone was and said although it was a small festival, it was one of their favourites. Jeff Hill said he fell in love with Sault Ste. Marie and the people here the first time he performed here in 2004. He really wants to come back next year. The USA Break Dancers loved the food...and the ladies...and the Hennessy. During our final dinner at Gran Festa Sunday evening, everything was quiet as we enjoyed our meals, and out of the blue in a loud, deep voice Julio exclaimed, "FUCK IT!! Screw Toronto and lets stay here for another weekend. The food here is too fuckin' good!"

Making the performers happy and welcome iis one of the prime objectives of the Buskerfest Committee, so these little things mean a lot to me. We want the word to spread in the busker world that the Sault is the place to be. We may be smaller but we're better.

Alright...enough chit chat. On to the momment you've been waiting for. Pictures.

...the Pirate...thanks again, Mark...


The USA Break Dancers...







Ivan Bellari, the fire guy...
...he lights himself on fire...cool...

...the flaming comb over...funny...

...some amazing fire breathing...



The Coralies...



Jeff Hill...I still can't watch the razorblade trick...*shudder*


...Scot Free...




Trulee Odd...


The Buskerfest Cabaret at Loplops Lounge...that was funny and freaky shit!...
...that's me on fire!...

...that's Jessica on fire!...

...that's a funny shot of Curt in my way...nice goin', dude...

...that's Scot Free as "Fesso the Clown" in a bra...

...that's Trule Odd in the thong we bought at the sex shop...

...that's a bunch of bloggers looking at Trulee Odd in the thong...

...that's a couple of white dudes layin' down some phat beats for the break dancers...


That's all for now folks. Remember the whole 849 picture thing? Yea...it's gonna take me a while to sort them all, but I wanted to share a few of my favourites with y'all. Check back soon for more...and more....and even more...

CHEERS!!

Blogelation...the Cabaret in a Nut Shell

Buskerfest Cabaret...Loplops Lounge...I got lit on fire and Scot Free took a picture of Mark Hohmann's junk...'nuff said.

Blogelation...Busker Sex Shop Run

Ever gone to a sex shop with a Busker?...no?...well I have and it was weird. Apparently Trulee Odd needed to get a thong for this eve's Cabaret Show. What kind of thong did he get and will it actually stay on? Attend the more adult themed Buskerfest Cabaret happening tonight at Loplops Lounge to find the answers to these pressing questions. Start time about 11:00pm. Ticket price; $10.00.

Keep your eyes peeled for the Buskerfest Photo show coming soon to Salckhopper's Stuff and Things...

Blogelation...Buskerfest Day One Done

Buskerfest's first day is now said and done with and I am tired as fuck...you heard me.

All the acts were amazing...at least on the stage. We seem to have hired ourselves a couple of prima donnas this year who shall remain nameless...UNLESS they cause me to melt down again...then, boys, I'm sorry but the magic gloves will come off and you'll cry like little girls.

Yes, the rest of the committee has told me I do not have to be there for the beginning on Saturday in order to give me a break. In all honesty, I more than likely will be there for the beginning anyway because I want to catch the acts and take more pictures.

So now on to the performances...

I caught all of the USA Break Dancers and they blew me away. In fact, I have a funny story about them witch made me very excited. Less than a week ago I saw a documentary called "Style Wars" at Shannon and Maria's place...a documentary about the whole graffiti/break dancing movement in New York City in the early 80's. In said documentary there was an AMAZING break dancer named "Crazy legs" who revolutionized and ushered in the break dancing style we see today. Turns out two of our own USA Break Dancers, Cuba and Will...aaahhh, Will...all I will say is "YUMMM"...anyway, their very first break dancing instructor was none other than, you guessed it, Crazy Legs. I found that really freakin' cool...and impressive...and just down right neat-o.

I also had the pleasure of viewing all of Ivan Bellari's show. He is one of only seven people in the world who does what he does...fire breathing. It was a more than impressive spectacle of flame and...well...more flame. Visually stunning. He weighs 400 pounds and eats fire and can be kinda scarey...but he's really a big pussy cat. Don't be scared, kids.

I only caught snippets of jeff Hill, the Coralies, Trulee Odd and Scot Free. From what I saw, they are all top notch entertaineers...very funny and very talented...and I plan on seeing and photographing all their performances tomorrow.

Right now I need to sleep...and find more volunteers to cover tomorrow night. Wanna help? Call me. So tired.

Did you know when you do spell check in blogger and it comes across the word "freakin'", it thinks the most suitable replacement word is "foreskin"?...and now I giggle...

Blogelation...and it begins...

So after some insanity this morning and only about two melt downs on my part, Steve saved me with the ever-reviving 12 CCs of suds and Buskerfest is officially under way.

The time is currently 5:56 in the pm and there is a good crowd of all ages gazing in delight and wonder at the oddities in the pitch. Two acts have performed; Trulee Odd and Jeff Hill, both of which wowed our fair city. The USA Break Dancers are up next and I am STOKED!!

...will write more soon...

yay buskerfest!

Buskerfest Blogelation: Prologue

The Buskers have arrived. We have consumed adult frosty beverages...and make shift tex mex food. The pitch has been surveyed. The piper is booked. My head has not yet exploded.

The event is set to kick off tomorrow at 3:30 in the pm and all seems to be going according to the grand scheme...that scheme being that no one who is not supposed to gets lit on fire, the public is entertained and I don't murder someone in the mean time....

...oh yea...and that my husband doesn't leave me 'cuz I have been ignoring him for the past 6 months...that's a biggie...

This is the third year for this oh so unique Sault festival and it keeps getting bigger and bigger every year. Six acts, three days and more entertainment than you can shake a devil stick at. What more do you want? Here are the official festival times;

Friday August 11 - 3:30 to 10:30
Saturday August 12 - 11:30 to 10:30 with the more adult Cabaret happening at Loplops at around 11:30
Sunday August 13 - 10:30 to 6:30

Be there or I will be forced to send Ivan after you and he eats small children and lights himself on fire for amusement...'nuff said.